Happiness

When was the last time you were truly happy?

I came across this question the other day in a magazine article and it haunted me the remainder of the day. That evening lying in bed I kept asking myself, "When was the last time I was truly happy?" Sadly I must admit, after careful consideration, I realized I have not been truly happy since 1993.

In 1993 I found myself divorced and single for the first time in my life. It was the year I found myself. In the past I had always been the person other people (parents, friends, husband, children, etc.) expected me to be . It was the year I discovered I could be me. I began to develope tastes of my own. I read what I wanted to read, watched what I wanted to watch (TV/movies), expressed my own opinions on religion, politics, etc.

Unfortunately however, it was short lived. I allowed my family to convince me to move back to my home state. I fought them at first, but I wasn't strong enough, by early 1994 they had me tucked deep into the family nest where I have slowly lost control of me.

Now it seems I have to do some soul searching and find a way to turn my life around so I can once again be truly happy.